Rurok ako ng unproductivity, mga 3 weeks na. 

I know ang tanging kelangan ko lang naman talagang gawin is to stay alive and stay home, but there's this guilt na i should be doing more. pero wala, im just so down and i feel anxious for the future, grief towards everything that should (and shouldn't) have happened if walang covid, sadness for what others are going through, anger, frustration at the government... at di ako makagalaw. Days pass by without me doing anything meaningful. I'm lucky and privileged: I have food to eat and a house to stay in; I moved in with my friend so I don't have to pay rent anymore. Anlaking ginhawa. May pera pa ko para mabuhay for abt 2 months, I guess. So yun, I'm alive. And being cooped up with a friend is way better than me living alone. For one, mahilig siya magluto HAHA. Ang she's really good company -- ansaya na may makakausap ako re everything that's happening. Plus, her adorable dog -- half corgi half japanese spitz --  is keeping us entertained. Ansaya pala ng may aso sa bahay. In my future house in Ghent I'll have a dog, a cat, and a lush garden wahaha

I'm dreaming again and I'll take that as a good sign

birth and rebirth and worth and mirth

wala im just reciting words that end with "erth" coz day of the earth

now wala na ko maisip kundi girth