I haven't been doing much work this year. I am *not* unemployed, but I am acting as if I am. When I wake up., I open the computer, planning to do some work but one site leads to another and poof, the morning is gone. Then poof, the afternoon is gone. I have been doing less than 3 hours of work per day. Yesterday, I worked for 10 minutes tops. 

The consequence of this is I am poor and I hate this feeling of grepaness but I can't stir myself from my chronic laziness. I need help. I am so distracted and I am having a hard time focusing. 

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I have been reading lots of dating websites and askmen subreddits. These are my guilty pleasures; something I don't want to admit even to my closest friend. It's embarassing because I don't practice the advice I read. I just... read them. What's the use, right? I know I should get out more often and fill up that OKC profile and go out on dates, but I always churn out excuses after excuses: I have nothing to wear, I have no money, I would rather curl up and watch Breaking Bad right now... yadda yadda. I need to get out and resist temptations to lazify.  

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I really like him. I am afraid of what he'll think of me if/when he finds out what I did a long time ago.