Nanay is going to Europe agian for work and she said na ayaw na niya pumunta dun, since her dream Europe trip already happened.

I stifled my tears.

Happy na natupad yung wish niya, na pinaghirapan niya for 19 years. Meanwhile I have a shit ton of guilt coz sobrang brat ko during the trip, everything just annoyed me that time and no one deserved my irritable behavior.

Im sorry im so sorry Im so guilty that Im not the person i shouldve been - kind and loving and happy about everything   - given that the trip was such a privilege and im the luckiest person in the world i have the best family

But they dont have the best daughter, certainly not the best sister, just a miserable piece of human who's okay sometimes

Im sorry